I thought we'd change it up a little bit this week.
If you'd like to listen along (the audio quality isn't the best, but it gets a lot better about have way through), there that option too.
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Ode to Ms. Steele and Mr. Grey, Chapters Seventeen through Twenty
with love, for E.L. James
Christian sleeps over post-coital, at Ana's
She awakes to his stifling body cabana;
He's late for a meeting and bolts in a rush,
Send e-mails at work, words evoking a blush.
Ana has some misgivings, so writes Christian the following:
"That was hot, but the guilt and the shame is so troubling,
I like you, and the sex, maybe even the pain
But I'm not sure I'm up for this power exchange."
She talks of the spanking, calls "assault" and "abuse,"
(words quite correct for young Ana to choose),
But Grey brushes it off with sly, stylish flirtation
Leaving Ana to ponder her Goddess' elation.
She's confused, but won't take her subconscious' advice,
And the prize of young Christian comes at quite a price,
Because kink isn't something to relish or savor,
But a toll to be paid for the grace of Grey's favor.
So Ana and Kate finish up with the packing
José brings some Thai food, they get with the snacking
Careless, Ana leaves e-mail and phone unattended,
And Grey likes a much tighter leash (pun intended).
He phones after a time, wondering what she's been up to,
He isn't too pleased; this behavior won't do.
Ana placates him sweetly, as oft' times she does,
They say goodnight, cooing like teenager doves.
She moves to Seattle, the perfect apartment
(How it's afforded conveniently absent)
Mr. Grey sends a gift, the playful tycoon;
It's champagne with a helicopter balloon.
*
In the morning, to Grey's house, to fulfill her role,
Then a doctors appointment to talk birth control
The choice: mini-pill! Progesterone prevention,
(Affects on her sex drive or mood aren't mentioned).
They've still not agreed on what boundaries need setting
And the contract lies empty; they just keep forgetting,
Ana toys with him, flirting "I haven't signed yet..."
He growls "But surely, you will, I would bet."
They're unclear and unsafe, but no matter, who cares!
Open negotiations don't have any flare!
Let's go play without them, it'll probably be fine!
Better yet, loosen up with a bottle of wine!
Light bondage goes down in the Red Room of Pain
Ana hung from the rafters with leather and chain,
She orgasms easy with only a crop,
He hits at her clit with sharp little pop!
(Because it's always that easy to come, don't you know?
Who needs foreplay or warm ups when Christian's your beau?)
Afterward, shaken, he binds up her wrists
Slipping zip-ties around them, 'cause that's super slick
Don't consider nerve damage or bottoming risks
This is sex, people! Fuck all that bored safety shit!
They do again, Goddess fucked to the floor
(Ana's words: "she puts a 'don't disturb sign' on her the door"),
Swept up in his arms, personalities multiple,
Ana drifts off to sleep, irresponsibly gullible.
She awakes after napping to find herself drawer-less
And hurries (she's meeting the parents) to dress
Her underwear missing, she finally figures
They'll be with Christian, per their kinky adventures.
Two can play that game, she quietly jokes,
And ventures commando to go meet his folks.
They're charming and rich, true Grey's to the core
House large, staffed with servants, though sort of a bore.
Entertaining themselves, they pay a brief visit
To the boathouse, where things progress quickly explicit,
Christian fucks Ana, no foreplay or prep
And just as they've finished, a creak squeaks on the step,
They're almost discovered, his sister sister bursts in,
"We're just admiring my trophies," he grins.
*
Tension, discussion, the way home in the car,
On what boundaries will govern, where to go and how far
Ana wants to know all of him, wants inside his head,
She wants "more," hearts and flowers, not just rooms painted red,
But at home, talks forgotten, their genitals swell,
And more sex ensues without further intel.
Oh Ana, now it's not just Christian who's toying
But you too, always so playfully cloying,
Will she or won't she or when will she sign?
Because until she does, it's just zip ties that bind,
No code, no sure boundaries, or rules for their play,
Just a love territory still dangerously grey.
And maybe there's hope to reform him, for normal,
For something without all this red leather formal.
Each of them hoping the other will waiver
Oh E.L., could you write a more fucked up endeavor?
*
I wish I could play them a favorite song
To illustrate all the ways this will go wrong,
Because whether you whip or you flog or you spank,
You can take OK GO's lyrics straight down to the bank:
There ain't much that's dumber, there ain't much that's dumber,
Than pinning your hopes on a change in another.
That goes for you too, Christian Grey, Anastasia,
Get your heads out of sand, 'cause the fall's not what kills ya,
It's not gonna work, or if it does, it's abusive...
But far be it for me to be so intrusive.
Go on with your story, I can't wait for the end,
What's next from Ms. James and her fabulous friends?
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